It's important, this thing called: honesty. And it's a funny sombitch. I say so because we, as a people (people being Americans in this case first, humans second) are pretty darn outspoken when it comes to what we think on surface matters (mostly crap we want to buy). We become tongue tied (some of us) when we attempt to speak our true thoughts, impulses and that sort of thing about the things that truly matter. I don't mean the drunken splat that erupts when our inhibitions are removed due to good old social-lube (booze, you sick/awesome bastard). Side: it should be noted that I have had a few. Moving on. I mean the thoughts that we marinate on daily, sometimes hourly. The thoughts that we are sometimes afraid of just having, let alone letting out of our respective word-holes. Mostly the positive. While we may be honest, we are scared to say what we really think.
Also, this isn't a how to. It's just what was on my mind.
I don't lie. It's not my thing. It has nothing to do with morals, either, it's more coming from a general hatred of wasting time and abiding that which is useless. I used to lie like a champ and all that it got me was a mess of people who treated me, themselves and our respective passions like garbage. It made getting to know people useless... Really, that's it: It makes the time you spend useless. My next phase was omission. I may not have been lying, but I wasn't letting anything true about my convictions out. Where's the fun in that? Where's the fear, the danger, the joy and the learning? How the fuck do you expect to learn, grow, change, enact chaos and order without being truly honest with others?
(Babbling paragraph) Others, of course, come later. First is honesty with yourself, but I find that most people are very smart and very much know what they are about, so we can skip that. Honesty with others is another bastard that comes from confidence. It can also be a great path to confidence. It's really easy, actually, to be confident. It is! More on that later. Now it's all about honesty with others, which leads to said confidence. Ahem...
We are unconfident for many reasons, but personally I find that I am most unconfident when I have my "idiot days." These are those days when you feel inferior in some way. Stupid, fat, a failure, and so on. No matter your intelligence, weight, successes and so on, most people have those days where we feel less than we are. I don't know why these days happen, and for todays purposes: I don't care. Your people, your inner circle, family etc can bring you out of this funk in many ways. The longest lasting, in my experience, is from the best source: their strength, their success, their brilliance.
The average person has at least one friend. It can be safely assumed that this one friend brings something very positive to that persons life. I'm talking about said friends merits. In some way, this person/these people is/are superior to you. Deal with it. I've got friends who can do a style of dance better than me, can sing better, can cook better and so on. We all do. When you look at them and you recognize this, accept and embrace this, it empowers you. You surround yourself with the best! It says volumes of you, the company you keep. The path to embracing your own brilliance can be nurtured through the embracing and celebrating of your people.
The next bit, my favorite bit, is saying the things on your mind. To make a long post short: It's so easy to say what's on your mind if you start with your people. Compliment them, praise the ever loving hell out of them. From there, you can hold your head high and do the same about yourself. Of course, you can also do this in the opposite way, it's just how I handle things.
This was fun to write. In part because I'd been drinking and watching West Wing and Angel. I feel like my next post will be less babbling. Meh. Still fun.
