SO, my friends and I were in Vegas. We were sitting in the lobby of the hotel we were staying at when a... I guess you could call her a security guard. She was without a gun, pepper-spray or cuffs and looked like a wind or perhaps her crack-head boyfriend could snap her in two with a slight shove (she was very skinny; malnourished, some might say). She did, however have a smock that read security. So... yeah, sure, she was security. Why not. I felt secure. Sure.
NOT THE POINT. The point is: she came over to us, patrons of the hotel, and told us to sit up and that we couldn't sleep in the lobby. Actually, first she asked if we were guests. "Yes we are," I replied. Then she told us we couldn't sleep int he lobby. We. Were. Not. Sleeping. In. The. Fucking. Lobby. Periods. Are. Being. Abused. To. Emphasize. Point. We were slumped, yes, but not sleeping. No slumping. Fair enough. Had she said no slumping... Whatever. So we said sorry and sat up and kept talking. Then she returned. One of us (can't remember who), had once again slumped, I guess, though I remember no one dropping more than maybe a solid inch in their seat. Again, "Hey," the bedraggled skag prodded, "You can't sleep in the lobby." Mind you, behind two of us there was a slovenly sack of a man full on snoring. Oh well. Whatareyagonnado?
This person was dead set on asserting her authority in some way. There was nary a soul in the hotel, it being the Life is Beautiful fest weekend and folks were getting their "drug-induced-dance-high-holy-crap-I'm-pregnant-wtf-happened" on, so I totally understand needing to look busy. No big deal. Doing her job, however useless. Who she thought she would stop from any true with her lonesome is beyond me, but that, again, is not the point.
The point is that she reminded me of something very important: Everyone needs to feel in control.
It's a simple thing that I always forget until I'm reminded. We all need control, one way or another. It's why some people have the jobs they have, or the hobbies and it's why so many people love to clean or love to do...anything their own way. Follower, leader, it doesn't really matter one way or the other, folks need to feel like their fate is in their own hands at least once or twice.
It's incredibly important if you're planning on being successful in anything, especially so if you're planning on reaching any point of great success (fame, wealth, or just being debt free etc). I deal with depression like a vast majority of Americans. I'm not sure it's clinical. No clue. Don't care. Not the point. What I do know is the power of momentum and how it's influenced by my feeling of control over my own situation. If I feel like I haven't done anything, haven't accomplished anything, I don't get a thing done. It's even hard to brainstorm when I haven't done anything that day or especially if it's been a humdrum week.
Control over a task can lead to completing said task, which has every chance of snowballing and creating momentum. Control + Task Completion (can)= Momentum. It's like a cyclical version of Yoda explaining the dark side. Control leads to success, success leads to momentum, momentum leads to control etc.
I do simple things, snowflakes really, to snowball my momentum. Doing dishes, laundry, blogging and so forth. Household tasks and the day to day, schedules and the like, make it very easy to move into more important things. Most everyone knows this. I sort of just forget it damn-near all the time. A reminder never hurts.
My personal favorite way to gain control is to give it up. Most people don't actively do this. Ever felt a relaxing calm wash over you when you just follow when you're on vacation? Or when you get a really good leader on a project? How bout something really simple like picking what the group eats that night? Displaying ultimate authority is the willingness in giving it away. A concept that I really love. Showing trust, allowing others to prove themselves grants you power in turn, grants you control. It's a fun experiment if you've never tried it. I highly recommend it.
All in all, the key to success is control. Big or small, you need to feel like you are still behind the wheel. Yes, it's okay and maybe even a good idea to give up control for a moment and let someone drive for a little bit. It lets you relax and take stock before getting back in the captains chair. Start small if you need and build it up. Whatever you need to do to feel strong, make sure that you do it.
Thanks, Plaza Security! I appreciate the life reminder. I hope you are having a good life.
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